oops!
by zoesurfergirl
Summary: There's a new guy at Hogwarts and he seems to get Hermione's atention, but this isn't sitting well with ron. What's a guy going to do to get the girl he loves? RHR


Oops!

"I know pronounce you man and wife," said the priest. Lord Voldemort and Dolores Jane Umbridge are finally married. After many months of waiting and telling Harry Lord Voldemort wasn't out to get him, they were married. Now to the adoption center to pick up there long lost son. Voldemort and Dolores were separated from the child when he was born.

Rupert, their son, is starting Hogwarts and is a year older than Hermione.

-In the great hall-

_God! He looks fine, fine, fine! I am so lucky Dumbeldore assigned me to watch him because if Pavariti were there would be no chance he would notice me. No one notices dull, plain, boring Hermione. I wished Ron would. But all he notices "Lav Lav" and her big butt. God she's ugly, like U-G-L-Y you ain't got no lullaby you ugly, ugly. _

"You must be Hermione, am I right?"

"Yes I am."

"I'm Rupert."

" Hello Rupert, come sit next to me."

Ron gave Rupert the look of death.

_Oh… my! He is so hot! And Ron seems really jealous. He's had five years of chances and I'm gone waiting for him. Look out Rupert; you're going to be falling head over heels soon!_

-The Fifth year girls' dorm rooms-

"Hey Pavariti could you help me?"

"Yeah what do you need?"

"I need to look pretty so a guy can notice me."

"I've been waiting three years for this. What were going to do is start with your make- up."

"But I don't wear any."

"Exactly."

"As I was saying…. Go with a light pink or a sparkly gold. Cover up will cover up your zits and such. Don't use blush and use this mascara. Use a lot of it. It makes your eyes look sezy"

" Ok"

"Ok. Next. Smile and feel/act confidant. Flirt when ever you get a chance."

" Ok seems easy enough."

"Great! Who is the lucky guy?"

"Rupert."

"Rupert… not Ron?"

"Yeah Rupert. I have given up on Ron. I mean he's had years to ask me. I need to move on."

"Don't forget smile, flirt and walk I like you're the most sezist thing on the planet."

- Next Day -

_Here goes nothing! Smile and walk sezy._

"Hermione!" exclaimed Ron.

"Is that you?" asked Harry

"Yes why?" snapped Hermione

" You look different," said Ron

" In a good way" added Harry quickly at the look of Hermione's face.

"Thanks. I felt like I needed a change."

"Hey Hermione is this seat taken" asked Rupert.

" Not at all."

_Time to flirt._

"So what class do you have next?" Hermione asked Rupert.

" Charms"

"Cool me, too. See you there." I said slyly. I got up and left leaving Rupert with a grin on his face, Harry eating toast like nothings up, and Ron with his mouth wide open.

_This is so easy! Awesome! I better hurry and hit the bathroom so I can brush my teeth before Charms. I don't want a piece of fruit stuck in between my teeth when I'm chatting it up with Rupert._

-Charms-

"I want you all to partner up and practice the cheering charms." Professor Flitwick said.

" Wanna be my partner." Hermione asked coyly to Rupert.

"Sure thing.

An hour later the classroom erupted with laughter. But Rupert and Hermione weren't laughing because of the spell but at funny blonde jokes. Hermione thinks they are the stupidest things ever.

"I told her that joke last week and she didn't laugh that hard." Ron said gloomily.

"What does it matter" Asked Harry suspiciously. He was glad Hermione found someone she liked.

"It doesn't" said Ron defensively.

"If you say so…"

-In the Boy's dorm-

Ron was laying in his bed thinking.

_I think something is up with that Rupert guy. And I'm going to find out. He's ruining my chance with me getting together with Hermione._

-In the Boy's Bathroom-

"Down the hatch. I'm glad that's over with. God it's hard to keep up with this beauty potion. But Hermione sure is worth it. She would so not like me if she saw my normal self. I need to murder Harry before anyone finds out. He is the reason I was kept from my family for 14 years." Said Rupert to himself. What he didn't know was that Ron was listening from the doorway. Ron walked away think what he had to do to save Harry and Hermione.

-The Griffendor Common Room-

_I'm so glad I found Rupert. I absolutely adore him!_

Ron bursts through the common room and grabs Rupert by the collar and chucks him out the window.

"Oops! I guess that was a bit too rash," said Ron.

"WHAT THE HECK DID YOU DO THAT FOR?" screamed Hermione.

" He wanted to kill Harry!" answered Ron.

"No one's after him."

"His dad is Lord Voldemort and Umbridge. He wanted revenge from being away from his family for 14 years."

" OH MY GHAWD!!"

"STOP SCREAMING HERMIONE!"

"STOP YOURSELF!"

"ALL RIGHT"

"FINE"

Ron swooped her up and kissed her full on the lips. The common room was empty by the way because ever one was at dinner. And they lived happily ever after by the way. Except Rupert he landed himself a straight jacket and a padded room at St. Mango's because the fall altered his brain and they were afraid he was going to murder other people as well.

The End


End file.
